In my defense, I have had neither computer or internet at my house since December 20th. Blame a wicked root system virus, and a lack of funds, respectively. So, I apologise to those of you who actually cared about what I have to say.
The other night, I had a crazy dream, one of those random things that makes no sense. But when I woke up, I realized that the peoples of the dream had all been Xangans. Not just my sister and friends, but those of you whose real names I don't even know: spokenfor, somebodyelsesgirl, Legendairy, and RennaissancePhoenix were all there. I realized just how much I've missed all this.
I've been working in the frame shop at Hobby Lobby, which in the world of retail is definitely on the high end of things, but let's be honest, not that mentally challenging. In fact, I'vebeen messing up on little things latesly, due to a complete lack of paying attention to what I'm doing. My mind is miles away, doing something more interesting. Frankly, It's not hard to be more interesting. The Lord is always taking care of us. He is slowly bringing us out of debt and into our dreams. But I still feel like I'm waiting indefinitely for the rest of my life to start. So, my mind, stranded in a swirling mire of inanity, wanders off somewhere more interesting. Interesting, but I suddenly understand, not at all productive. I've been daydreaming and pondering for weeks with little input, and the result is a brain that feels like pudding and no new ideas. And I realized that in my new, fast-paced life where I work outside the home, I had had nothing interesting to stimulate my synapses in some time.
So, at a borrowed machine and with borrowed time, I am back to xanga. This lovely, imaginary world full of real people. The beauty of this imaginary world is that, unlike the one in my head, there are others to contribute, to incite, to dream with, to banter and sharpen. It's beyond interesting. Though it occurs to me that this particular post is not so very.
So, Maybe next time, I'll have some new thoughts to share. In the meantime, keep it coming.
Love to all.
Comments (5)
Yay! Glad to see you back here. I was thinking most everyone had abandoned xanga.
I was worried too, Rae!
Yes, I am also now reassured, as I was afraid that something had happened to you, dear friend, since you hadn't posted in so long (not that I'm any better, but you have always been faithful)...glad to hear that all is well, if not a bit busy!
I'm glad you are back!
I've been taking a sort of hiatus from Xanga too, hoping to focus more energy on my business. Turns out, I don't want to think about business all of the time and I LOVE hearing other people's stories and being inspired by other people's lives. I've also been reading books more, which I didn't have a lot of time to do before, but books just aren't the same thing as sharing real life with others.
I think Hobby Lobby is a pretty neat store. I always get inspired when I go there. I guess I don't hang out much in the frame department though.
I understand how it could turn mindless. Hang in there!
Don't be a stranger, ya hear?
Glad you're back! :DÂ
Oh, and the name's Amanda. :DI've kind of given up on Xanga recently too, but for different reasons. When I'm not talking to anyone else about what's happening in my life right now, I can sustain the opinion that everything that has happened in the past few months is really good for me and is only going to get better. But when I start having to explain it to other people, and I start getting the "Oh, I'm so sorry"s and the "What are you going to do now?"s, well, then I start to panic and question whether I am doing anything right any more. But I just spent the whole morning staring blankly at an empty page and realizing that there is nothing of consequence happening in my mind. I need some impetus to keep thinking, and maybe I can find it here.